Friday, December 18, 2009

Drat, Drat and Double Drat


It's happened, folks. The dreaded Christmas cold has caught me in it's icy-hot fingers. I am sniffling, sneezing, and my throat feels like I just swallowed a grape...an aching grape, at that.

Given a choice, I think I'd rather have the scratchy, raw kind of throat that stings when you swallow than the so-swollen-it-even-makes-your-ears-hurt, I'd-almost-rather-die-of-thirst-or-hunger-than-swallow kind. (Don't you despise reflected pain? It's just neurons being nasty, and it's uncalled for.) And Chloraseptic spray doesn't even help the second variety. Nope, this one apparently goes out only by prayer and fasting. (Irreverent. Sorry.) But true as well, because prayer and fasting are probably the only things that will really work at this point. The Airborne sure didn't! (Well, okay, it did stave it off for a week...But I needed to make it to January.)

One final thought. (I know you can't wait to read it. I am really uplifting when ill.) Okay, really raving may be closer to the truth (I've been up since 4 AM), but here's the thing: Don't you hate the way there are no words besides "achy" to describe the second kind of sore throat (the latter) (as opposed to the former, I mean) that I mentioned here? I'm serious! I feel unsettled when the English language fails me. I wanted you to "feel my pain" as it were. In a purely psychic sense, of course. But no such luck, because I can't quite nail it. This throat is not throbbing or gnawing or pinching or spasming or even twinging. (Those last two may or may not be words.) And by the way, the fact that I would employ such questionable modifiers when they aren't even working speaks to the extent of my esophageal distress. Why couldn't I just have the raw, scratchy, stingy kind of sore throat, anyway? Three perfectly succint adjectives and BAM!, I'd be home free. And probably back in bed right now.

I wonder if an IV would be out of order?

;)

PS. Relax, Mom. I'm just havin' a little whine here, okay? No harm, no foul. No fever, no swine flu. Just a crummy, crappy cold. =)

PPS. My survival is almost certain.

9 comments:

Momza said...

After reading this, I think I may have a sore throat too!!
Feel Better Soon!! There's much celebrating to do!

Amy said...

I saw the picture and my first thought was "this does not bode well. I hope she isn't sick." My hope wasn't strong enough to make it true. Sorry. I hope you feel better in a few days rather than longer. It may even be gone by Christmas!

Heather Anderson said...

Sorry you don't feel well... if I lived closer I would make you some chk soup... we have all been sick too so maybe we will all get over it and have a healthy xmas this year!

jen said...

I'm sitting here racking my brain for a good word for you. I'll think about it today, and I'll get back to you. But, the accessibility of words in my brain is currently very limited. Maybe Tucker will have a good word for me. He's the resident poet.
I'll be back.

Jess said...

It's going around, I got it last night too. I think burning, tender, throbbing or voice altering would describe this cold well. Glad you were able to get your prep for the family gathering mostly done before this reared its very ugly head. Your house looks beautiful.
GET WELL SOON!

Em said...

the sore throat. yuck.
hate the sore throat.
makes me drink lots of water, so that is good.
pork loin has a runny nose.
the kind that i can't get it all out with the bulb syringe, not matter how great i am at it.
the kind that causes him to wake up in the middle of the night b/c he can't breathe and the kind that has just caused him to wake up early from his nap.

hate that kind.
i'm hoping you are better by christmas.
and us too.
just a little whine from us to validate yours;-)

Darlene said...

Golly gee, I'm the one that everyone is so concerned about getting sick. You're afraid to have me around if any of the kids are sick, or I should say have them around me. I shouldn't even mention that I haven't had a cold in over three years and I hope to goodness that I don't get one this year. IT doesn't pay to brag, so forget that I even mentioned this. Practically everyone I know has had a cold during this season so I have certainly been exposed a lot. Hope my luck holds out.

Having said that, I do hope that you get over yours very quickly. My friend Verna was so sick about four days ago and she went to the doctor(my doctor, I might add) and he gave her a prescription for levequin. That may not be the exact spelling, but it was for five pills. It cost $160 for five pills, but she is almost over it and it was deep in her chest. In fact she felt so much better that she made clam chowder that her son, Jeff, made her when they were back in Washington D.C. for Thanksgiving. He is quite a good cook and we went over there just as we were, dressed in our baking clothes, and was it ever delicious. I will have to send you the recipe. She still had one pill to take tomorrow, but it was like a miracle. I hope yours doesn't go down to your chest.

In the meantime, chicken soup sounds like a good idea. Don't you know how to make the quick variety. If not, let me know.

KC Mom said...

Oh dear...I hope you are feeling better soon! What a yucky thing to happen to such a nice person...and right before Christmas!

Karen said...

As soon as I feel that 'ache' I start gargling (sp) with listrene like 4 times a day. Really I think it help stave off the sore throat this week. Oh, and I have very minty breath!

Hope you feel better soon.

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