Friday, May 7, 2010

A Mother Heart


If there's anything I know about myself, it's that I have a mother heart. In fact, I am all-mother, all the time...and I love it!

I also love Jen, as well as the great series she's been providing this week for all of our motherly enjoyment. I have read, laughed, and cried with the best of you, savoring every minute. Which explains why I'm going along with La Denton's request to talk about one aspect of my mothering that needs work and one at which I excel. (I feel like I'm about to start group therapy.)

Okay. What is my fatal flaw as a mom? In the interest of keeping it real, I have asked the four guinea pigs I learned on for some straight-up feedback. I questioned my daughter-in-law, too, but she "didn't have a worst." ;) Not so with my own children! So far, three have reported back with essentially the same answer, so I think it's a pretty safe bet that I've got the right one.

I am...(drum roll, please)...a little bit too enthusiastically involved with...(did one of them say obsessive about?...oh, surely not)...various things in their personal lives that they are already perfectly aware of and working on. (Excuse the dangling prepositions, but a quote is a quote, right?)

And now for my thoughtful response: Who, me?! Or moi, as the case may be.

All right, I'll come clean. Mea culpa. Guilty as charged. It seems this mother's never-ending interest in the well-being of her children can get a bit intrusive at times. Annoying, even. But have no fear, my friends, because I have already taken extraordinary measures to remedy the situation. Case in point: I've refrained from mentioning a certain individual's ill-advised purchase of a rather costly vehicle for several weeks now, and this omission is by design, people! No simple oversights here. I have a nosiness-recovery plan, and I am executing it. Other topics I have carefully avoided mentioning are...oops...wait a minute. I'm not supposed to talk about them. Which would include listing them publicly, I guess. (Boy, this is trickier than I thought.) I think you'll agree that I've got it covered, though. I am mother, hear me roar......(or plug your ears......or press "ignore.") heehee

I wouldn't be at all surprised if that dazzling display of wit prompted you to guess that sense of humor might be my "most excellent" parenting trait. Not even close, I'm sorry to say. It appears that my upside is far duller than that. You'll be thrilled to learn that the motherhood quality my kids say I kick the most you-know-what at is this: being completely supportive, the "glue" that holds our family together. Oops, did I nod off there for a minute? I mean, is that the ho-hummer of ho-hummers, or what? I am completely supportive (so is a well-fitted bra), and I hold our family together (so does our love for Mexican food and a good book). Sheesh! Is that what it all boils down to in the end? Me, Playtex, Pedro's, and printed matter? And what about the Lakers? They hold our family together, too.

All kidding aside, let's take this thing full circle. If there's anything I know about myself, it's that I have a mother heart, and I am thrilled to know that my children find in me someone they can always count on, no matter what. That's why I will happily spend the rest of my life and eternity doing anything and everything I can to hold our family together.

Because it means the world to me. And so do they.

=)

PS. After my second son texted me his response to the question at hand, I texted him back saying that the best and worst traits he came up with were like two sides of the same coin. I loved his answer: "Yes, But it's a nice coin." How cute is that?

PPS. I forgot to mention my new post on the Mormon Women site today. Hope you'll take a minute to go over and check it out!

15 comments:

Cherie said...

Sue I KNOW you are a great mom!! I can tell from the way your write and the way you have talked about your family and kids from past posts that you definately are the glue that holds your family together. That is the way it should be - it is definately a huge part of being a mom :D

And, even though they don't like it, as moms, we really do need to be "All up in their buzi-nessss" (picture me snapping my fingers in an up and down motion! ha ha). All part of being a mom!!

I think I definately have that trait too - good or bad :D

Snarky Belle said...

It's a priceless coin! And yes ma'am, you most certainly do have a mother heart. I have felt it, and I'm not even your child. You are a blessing to so many. Much love and Happy Mother's Day to you!

jen said...

Thanks, Sue, for posting today. My biggest fear was that no one would participate, but I knew, deep down, that I could count on my writer-friend.

Good luck on your "issue." Wish I was a therapist, but I have no solution, because a child's business is a mom's business, right?

And I'm with Natalie--I have felt your mother's heart and love. Thanks for being my friend.

Frosty said...

A mother's heart is truly one of the greatest things we can obtain. And to spend eternity fostering it...well worth it!

Happy Mother's Day Sue!

Caroline of Salsa Pie said...

I've felt your Mother's Heart too! I know you are a great Mom.
My downfall as a Mom is that I worry too much. Maybe all Moms do this but sometimes I parent out of fear instead of intuition. I know I'm a newer mom (with my oldest being 4) so I work at trying to chill out about all the "what ifs" . I can totally see myself as an over-involved (but is there really such a thing?) Mom when they get older.
Happy Mother's Day, Sue. You deserve a big one.

Joyful Noise said...

You have again voiced everything that I have been thinking! Your "weakness" and my weakness are the same, your "strength" and my strength are also the same. As I was reading your post I was thinking that I wanted to comment that the problem was that the strength and weakness were woven together! And again, you came up with the same conclusion.

Your choice of music had me sobbing. Especially since I was thinking about how I would do ANYTHING (and have) for my children.

Beautiful post!

Anna M said...

mmmm, mexican food.

I see your face often in the comments section of various blogs I frequent. Now I see how awesome and clever you are... up front. I can't wait to read about your plan re. the expensive car.

karen said...

I sense that you are a most beloved mom, and if you're in their business too much, it's just a momentary irritation. (Because who, after all, likes to be given "advice?")You are the glue that holds the family together, and it's not boring AT ALL. It's lovely. Your wonderful sense of humor is what makes it all possible. Thanks for being my friend. Believe it or not, you've given me a good dose of self confidence.

Jamie said...

Stopping by from jen's-I love this post! I especially love that all your kids said the same thing! That made me laugh. If there's a flaw to have, I'd say caring too much is the one to have! I'm sure your children willingly tolerate all that "enthusiastic involvement" when it means so much love comes on the flip side. Loved your son's observation-how sweet! Have a beautiful Mother's Day

Jess said...

Sue I think you have a mother everything- your own children obviously adore you, and so do all of those away-from -home kids in the singles ward you're the mother of. What lucky kids to have you- smothering and all!
and I too am a bit of a smother

Amy said...

You are so funny. Really. Even if your kids didn't say so, I say so. And let's be honest, we all need a good supportive bra. A good one is hard to come by. And pizza? Yum! So see, it is a good thing to be supportive and the "glue."

Darlene said...

Wish I had your brand of glue. I don't seem to be able to hold my family together, and yet, when you are together (infrequently) you all have such fun together. Beats me, but I know that you all love each other even though.

You REALLY are a great mom, not just good, but GREAT!!!! Your kids really do connect with you. They all call you a lot and it seems to me that they welcome your advise, at least they always like to hear your opinion on whatever it is they are concerned about. I try not to give advise unless it's asked for. I'm getting better at this, but unfortunately, I was not always that good at holding my tongue. Live and learn, that's what I have experienced. It would be interesting to know what my kids would all say if I asked them what they felt were my best and worst qualities. Would you like to start? Email me your answers, please.

At any rate, it is wonderful to be a mom. I can't imagine how life would be at this time of my life, if I didn't have all my children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. I don't even like to think about it. I do have friends my age that do not have children or family of their own and all I can say is that they are very lonely.

Your children all adore you, and so does your mom, by the way.

KC Mom said...

Guilty as charged here too.
I think is....when your children have children that are the age of your children now...they will understand.
I can imagine that our Heavenly parents are kind of in the same boat.
They continue to worry and want to be involved in our lives even if we don't necessarily think we want them or need them to be. Although, when you get to be my age...you regret not allowing that involvement in.
Someday, I think our kids will feel the same way. :)

Jill said...

Sometimes we feel like we have to apologize for loving our kids so much huh? It's in us, it's what we are made of. Once we become a mother we are never the same again. And though sometimes we annoy our children, what would they do without us? :)

Michelle said...

I love the coin phrase.

And I actually think being the glue is the ultimate compliment. Nurturing matters.

I love your mother heart and am grateful to know you.

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