Saturday, March 26, 2011

HR = HUMAN Resources: A Rebuttal

Jenny Matlock has thrown us a bit of a curve with this week's Saturday Centus. That wily woman has asked for a poem––a rhyming one––and we have 100 words to convince her that we can get the job done. The prompt, as always, is in red.


HR = Human Resources:
A Rebuttal

©2011 Susan Noyes Anderson

I’m not a chicken or a mouse,
nor yet a silly goose.
I’m no one’s little lamb, dead duck,
or sly fox on the loose.

Don’t call me pussycat, tigress,
or cheetah…That ain’t funny.
I’ll never be somebody’s sweet
care bear or honey bunny.

I’d dance the funky monkey, but
I wouldn’t wanna be one.
How can I laugh like a hyena
when I never see one?

People are people, animals
are animals. Done deal!
If owls were wise, they’d all know Whoooo;
if chicks were girls, they’d squeal.

I ain’t no eager beaver;
I’m the wrong species and class.
So where does my boss get off
calling me a lazy a**?!


PS. Today is the last day to enter my 800th-post giveaway. You can sign on here, if you do it before midnight!


anitamombanita said...

one thing for one would ever call YOU a lazy a** (or a chicken!)! LOL

Judie said...

OMG! This is a "hoot," Sue!

Wanda Metcalf said...

very very nice!! ~giggles~

,.'; Well I will join you in the funky monkey since you came over and did the chicken dance ,.';

Have a great weekend

Terra said...

Absolutely wonderful! I completely enjoyed this from first word to last! Wonderful..

Nonna Beach said...

Awesome job Sue ! Very lyrical and clever !!!

Happier Than a Pig in Mud said...

Amen sister! Great poem, do we work for the same boss?

June Freaking Cleaver said...

This is perfect! That boss was a snake in the grass!

Laraine Eddington said...

Good one Sue.

Rekha said...

This is truly a piece of art...loved this....

Bookie said...

This is extraordinary, Sue. You always do well, but you handle rhyme superbly!

Dazee Dreamer said...

great, great job.

Donna said...

Thanks for a good are SO clever!!!

Jo said...

freaking hilarious!!! geez, i just love everything you write, you are one talented chick .... err human!!!


Enjoyed checking out your blog. I'm a grandma and writer too. I love being both.
Happy to meet you.
Check out my blog.
Writing: the ups and downs

I have a feeling we have much in common. Blessings, Barb

karen said...

Hahahaha! Good one Sue! I needed a funny one today. You never disappoint.

Brian Miller said... your ending...snort...big smiles.

Momza said...

too funny, Sue. You always know how to turn a phrase, a word, a sigh...!

Tgoette said...

Amazing job, Sue! You are really in your element when it comes to verse! Another brilliant effort this week! said...

I really enjoyed this Sue. I'm sure there are plenty of employees who'd love to send this letter too!

jeff campbell said...

Very funny and great rhyming...Peace and blessings

Kat said...

I just knew that I would love your Centus this week, and I was right! You are so clever, and I just loved your rhyme. Kat

Caroline of Salsa Pie said...

Sue, I am eagerly awaiting the day that you publish all of your poetry from this blog into a book. Then you make a button on the sidebar that says "Purchase Here" so we can all buy one. Just an idea! :)
This one is hilarious! This is one of my favorites because I love things that make me laugh. :))

Connie said...

I have been perusing your blog and checking out your poetry blog. You rock! What talent you have!
Congratulations on 800 posts! I hope you do 800 more!

Thanks for the chuckle this morning.

Dina @ 4 Lettre Words said...

Goodness...that's great, Sue!

Brian Miller said...

smiles. know i was here already but thought i would pass through as i am resting from all the walking in NYC...been a great time so far...hope you had a good weekend!

Amy said...

Ha! So funny!

Jess said...

Good thing that term doesn't apply to you, Sue- you're quite the busy girl with all 801 posts!

Kristin said...

Hee! giggling . . . so clever :D


Farmer's Wyfe said...

You always amaze and make me grin! Love your succinctness and humor!!
...and I've sat and sat here and can't think of one animal comment to respond to this with! You win!!!

Ⓙ @ $ € € ₦$ ₣®0₥... said...

Hilarious! I hadn't read the 'assignment', so I didn't see the end coming!!

cj Schlottman said...

Sue, This is soooo funny. You never disappoint me! Thanks for reading and commenting on my pitiful poem.


gaelikaa said...

I loved this one! Very funny!

~Lissa said...

Hahaha This is really funny. And your verses and rhymes flow so naturally. Great job!

Jenny said...

Sue. Sue! SUE!!!! You are totally a Mozambique genius if I've ever seen one.

This was really, really fabulous.

Well done, honey bunny.

I mean...ummm... Sue!

This was totally fab!

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