Monday, August 31, 2009

Hark, the Day of Colonoscopy Has Arrived!

It's here. The day I've dreaded for six first foray into the wonderful world of colonoscopy. Or maybe I should say the wild and wacky world. Or the wretched world. I'll keep you posted on that.

Of course, I recognize that it's entirely possible that you don't want me to keep you posted. Maybe you prefer not to hear about it at all, lest your entire nervous system go into some kind of involuntary sympathetic reaction, thereby making you feel like more of a participant and less of a voyeur in regard to my most excellent adventure.

Be that as it may, I am sharing. Your decision to read or not to read, as always, is up to you. After all, free agency is what Sue's News, Views 'n Muse is all about (our creed, as it were), and that includes right to peruse or or run...embrace or shun. It's your call, my friends. Entirely yours.

Having said that, I do hope you will take under serious advisement the immortal words of whatever anonymous, shameless, and irrepressibly maudlin creature(s) penned these little gems:

A friend walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
A friend sees through you and still enjoys the view. (I find this image somewhat disturbing.)
A friend knows everything about you and still likes you.
And, finally...
Lots of your friends will ride with you in the limo, but a real friend will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.

Well, the limo done broke down, folks! And as you can see, I don't like riding the colonoscopy bus alone. Or at all, for that matter.

And now for the public service announcement:

The simplest way for average-risk individuals to prevent colon cancer is to receive colon cancer screening starting at age 50 and continuing through age 75. Colon cancer is the third leading cause of death due to cancer in the United States. About 75% of people who develop colon cancer are 50 or older with no other identifiable risk factors. Getting a colonoscopy can reduce the average person's risk of dying by 70-90% (depending upon the study) and, when diagnosed early, the majority of colon cancers are completely curable.

So, even though talking about colonoscopy can be funny (as I found out last night, discussing it brazenly with friends at an open house), getting a colonoscopy is serious business. If you've reached the golden age of 50 and haven't quite been able to force yourself to comply with the Surgeon General's advice, the Sue General advice is...JUST DO IT.


PS. Having just read this post over, I am impressed to add one final cloying platitude: "A true friend thinks you are a good egg even when you are half-cracked." (Which I appear, in this moment, to be.)

I blame the Miralax.


Karen said...

Hope everything 'comes out okay' - lame I know! Such an important thing and yet we dread it. Good luck and thanks for sharing! :)

karen said...

I KNOW, right? I'm 55 and haven't been able to muster the huevos to get myself in there. I think I'm waiting for Mr Norman to go with me. A tandem colonoscopy, as it were. I've heard it's the day before that's the worst, but I'll let you tell me. And you can tell me EVERYTHING, darling.

KC Mom said...

You go girl! Let us know how it all comes out! ;)

VK said...

Drink it all in, and realize you are a tough cookie.

em said...

sean had to get one when we were engaged once. they had him so doped up. i still wish i could have recorded everything he said on the car ride home. i couldn't stop laughing!

Lisa said...

yes please let us know how it went, and how it turned out. Maybe then it would be "comforting" for us to be able to go get one too. (shudder)

Natalie said...

Personally, I like my eggs half-cracked! :)
Thank you Sue General for the PSA. Good Luck!

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