Wednesday, August 11, 2010

More than the Vapors


Oh, woe...woe, woe, and woe is me! [archaic, melodramatic, redundant]

O friends who find a friend in me, how fickle a friend is life... [archaic, melodramatic, redundant]

Oh, wretched soul that I am, free me! Prithee, this wretched coil doth grip, grate, grind, and yea, garrote my soul within me... [archaic, melodramatic, redundant, and excruciatingly alliterative]

Ridiculous, you say? Okay, you're right. And no one admits it more freely than I do. But some degree of drama should accompany my post today, because (after a valiant battle fueled by Airborne, germ-consciousness, and sheer will), I have succumbed at last to the mysterious coughing malady that permeated and frankly, plagued, our beach house trip this year. Yep, after fighting it off for a couple of weeks, I have reluctantly yielded to the hacking, wheezing, sneezing, aching, flu-like cold that doesn't quit. But I want you to know that I went down fighting!

cough cough {gasp} cough {sniffle}

I sure hope you don't lose any sleep over this thing. My post is hardly a bid for sympathy. In fact, even the thought of being pitied makes me uncomfortable. After all, I'm just sick. Big deal. It happens to everyone, sooner or later. And besides...

No soul upon this careless orb could pity me e'en half so well as I am clearly wont to do myself. Nay, nary one. [see above]

As you can see, I am an expert self-pitier.

;)

PS. Why is it that suffering feels so much better when articulated in poor replicas of olde English? (And looks a little more tragic penned in red?)


PS. If you haven't entered my 600th post giveaway, be sure and check it out before you go! Today at 11:59 PM is the last day to try your luck at winning the "i blog" or nienie-inspired "All Is Well" necklace!

20 comments:

jen said...

Why? Because the Victorians perfected the art of "the vapors."

Jackie said...

We've got it here too. Being sick is infinitely worse when your 3 year old and baby are also sick.

Alas. Why don't moms get sick days.

Get better ASAP!

Janis said...

I'm sorry! I sure hope you feel better. Vapor patches are the best! Try one! Feel better!!!

Jill said...

Oh I'm sorry. It is so frustrating to be sick.
Have you tried the vitamin D? They say most of us are deficient in that. That really helps your immune system. I take it in the form of cod liver oil. Makes an incredible difference.

On the other hand, sometimes illness is the price we pay for loving our family. :)

Caroline of Salsa Pie said...

I agree with Jen! Oh Sue, I hope you feel better soon. It's no fun to be sick. Vics Vapor rub always works well for me along with Chicken Noodle Soup! Thinking of you...

Sue said...

Of course, Jen! Victorian and vapors go together. Now, why didn't I think of that?!

And, Jackie, I hope your little ones recover VERY soon...

=)

PS. Loved Janis, Jill, and Caroline's recommendations, too, because they validated exactly what I'm doing...Vitamin D, Vicks Vapor Rub, and LOTS of fluids. Especially peppermint tea!

Darlene said...

Summer cold of any kind are truly vexing. When Dave caught it from the kids, I was really afraid you might get it.

Get that vapor going in the Vicks Vaporub.

Mumsy said...

Oh, I am so sorry...feel better and be well very soon. Hugs

Lisalulu said...

I wondered when YOU would come down with this... after you were such a FlorenceNightingale at the beach! Go Grandma (even grandma's get sick too)

Cherie said...

I think being sick does bring on melodramatic behavior but isn't it usually the men?? Ha Ha Just saying!!
Hope you feel better soon my dear!

karen said...

So sorry you got sick! That dang thing is really going around - people here at the office have it and I've been washing my hands like a maniac. Rest is the best thing - after all, you've got to be all better by Labor Day!

Just ME the MOM said...

Ooaooao! Hope you're back in the swing of things quickly! I think that's what happens when you sit down - the bugs triumph!

Kristin

fawndear said...

Most enchanting and poetic sick post ever. Would that my own could wax so elegant in speech while down instead of moan and whine.
However, my 19 year old son did request Pride and the Prejudice (the short version) for the last time he was beset with the stomach heaves. He thought it would put him to sleep, but nay, he watched the whole thing. Sometimes sick is romantic - on paper, not in real life.

Lourie said...

Not nice. I hope you get better soon.

Michelle said...

"Why is it that suffering feels so much better when articulated in poor replicas of olde English?"

Love that.

Get better soon. I hate being sick. Hard not to feel melodramatic when you wonder if you'll ever feel good again.

My name is PJ. said...

Oh, you poor, poor thing!!! You gave it your best. Zinc lozenges, baby. Zinc lozenges.

cj Schlottman said...

Sue, Honey, I want pity when I feel bad! I turn into a whiny tee-tee baby and feel very sorry for myself. You are a better woman than I.

when it comes to describing angst, I agree that old English or even the translated works of Proust and Flaubert have it all over us who are limited to modern words

Great post!

..........cj

yaya said...

Working in surgery and wearing masks, gloves, and all other protection didn't keep the "crud" from me this past winter...hopefully the summer "crud" doesn't strike too! So sorry you're ill because to get this in summer just stinks!! But knowing the human body like I do, the best thing is time and lots of rest. So take care!

Nezzy said...

Oh girl this is great. I feel bad for your malady but I laughed 'till I cried big old Ozark farm chick tears! Heeehehehehe1

From the tepid hills and hollers of the Missouri Ponderosa, ya'll have a wonderfully blessed day!!!

Amy said...

Ugh, You sure fought it for a long time. Summer is no time to be sick! I pray it will be quick. And you are funny. I love the pitiful old English writing. Perfect.

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