Pass the Dreams and Angel Wings!

Yesterday, in Relief Society, we explored the notion of feeling stagnant...or stuck in a rut. We also discussed what we might do about it. I'll get to that subject later, but first I want to take a look at how much the concept of stagnating resonated with me. In fact, I found myself listening with my spiritual ears, the one that perk up when the Lord is speaking to me. I am well aware (from past experience) that when the Lord talks, I need to listen. This quick story illustrates my point:

When our bishop spoke in last week's ward conference, he shared a cute and memorable vignette. He was visiting a family in our congregation and became engaged in an animated conversation with the parents. The conversation was marred by their youngest child, who kept saying, "Bishop, Bishop, Bishop" until the good man's attention was focused, finally and to her great satisfaction, on that persistent little girl. Once she had his full regard, the child chided him firmly, "I'm trying to listen to my show!" In a flash of personal inspiration, the situation flipped, and he envisioned the Lord calling for his attention, "Bishop, Bishop, Bishop...", then continuing, "I'm trying to show you the way."

Sometimes I am guilty of talking over the Lord (with words spoken out loud or in my head), but at church yesterday, my outer and inner dialogue was stilled sufficiently to hear the message that stagnating, on any level and to any degree, is not what I came here to do. In those days when I had children at home, I was actively engaged in so many good things that I could hardly find time to do them all, let alone stagnate. After the last one left, I took a job that kept me so busy I couldn't take the TIME to stagnate, especially if I wanted to get everything else done in my life. Even after resigning that position in the summer of 2007, I had places to go, people to see and plenty of things to do––like remodel my kitchen, plan a wedding, be a grandma, fulfill my calling, even start a blog. I was heady with new choices, and I was taking advantage of my opportunities. Quite happily, in fact.

Don't get me wrong. Today, I still find new opportunities. For the past year I've been married to a bishop...and plenty of activities go along with that...as many as you are able or willing to embrace. But here's what my heart is telling me: Not one bit of all the "stuff" I do or neglect to do constitutes a get-out-of-jail(rut)-free card on the stagnation thing. I am realizing more and more that, while being busy does make inertia a bit more difficult, it can provide no magic bullet against that state. And being less busy than you're used to can either give you wings to fly or webs to get stuck in.

Unfortunately, I think I've gotten myself into a position where I'm a little more stuck and a lot less lofty than I'd like. Which is why I am going to take the challenge offered me in Relief Society yesterday! I am going to embark, once again but in a whole new way (because after all, am I not a whole new person every time I choose to renew myself?), on the Personal Progress program. Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks? And besides, the medallions are different now. ;)

Hey, I'm willing to bet that a 57-year-old woman can still find some dreams and angel wings out there. And why should "new beginnings" be reserved for the young?

=)