Saturday, July 17, 2010

Stuck on Replay


Saturday Centus has rolled around again. For those who don't already know, this is a writing meme where usually Mr. Jenny (but this week Sami) gives us a prompt that we mix gently or not so gently with 100 of our own words to create a little story gem of our own. The prompt is in red.

Here goes........


“Did you see Scott’s SUV after practice? He’ll never get that freakin’ lipstick off.”

“Stupid cheerleaders. His dad’s pissed, dude.”

The voices ran through Sarah’s mind like a recording, over and over, without relief. Snatches of backseat conversations, boisterous shouts from the yard, muffled discussions in the shared bedroom.

“Hey, watch the language, guys.”

Her own voice replayed, too. Shrill, sometimes. Was it last week or a lifetime ago? Would she have done anything differently if she’d known?

She needed to feel something. Anything. The CD loaded. Judy Garland always made her cry.

Somewhere, over the rainbow…

Sarah waited, willing the grief to spill over.

But there was nothing. Just ghosts and replays.

23 comments:

Momza said...

YOu always say how busy I am, but reading your posts this last week, I think you're the busy one!!
hugs !

Bookie said...

/The song is beautiful but sometimes it makes me cry too.....

Viki said...

This was totally different than everyone else's so far this week. I really loved it. I especially loved the teenage language too lol. Good job.

Kat said...

Really nice, evocative take on the prompt Sue. Your ear for "teen speak" is impeccable, and you really captured that feeling of numbness that grief can bring. Great job! Kat

Cheryl said...

Gotta agree with Kat on this one. You captured a moment in time eloquently.

Tina said...

Just ghosts and replays. LOVE that line. Nice capture of a mood here. I really liked this one.

Karen Mortensen said...

Wow is all I can say.

BECKY said...

Hey, Sue! Fantastic!!

jfb57 said...

Chilling but a beautiful use of the prompt!

People Who Know Me Would Say: said...

I'm of the opinion that you should save all your Centus posts and make a little book out of them. You've got the goods.

karen said...

Interesting... What is going on in that head of yours? Everything you come up with is so... unexpected. But good. Really good.

Jenny said...

Sue! I didn't read your link yet since I do them in order, but come visit the SC post from yesterday again please! Some fun news for you there!

Grandma Yellow Hair said...

Great story Sue! You always have the most wonderful stories for me to enjoy. I use to sing that song all the time way too much I think.
Love the post below this about the guys bonding in your kitchen. What a great thing for all of them and you and your hubby are such blessings to share your home with all.
I miss coming by here. Hope soon I get back to my normal blogging visits.
Love ya
Maggie

Katie Blacker said...

ooooh. good writing as usual. perhaps a teen fiction is in your future?

Tgoette said...

Wow, that was intense! I especially loved the last line. Just brilliant. Great original take on the prompt this week, Sue! Well done.

cj Schlottman said...

I didn't see this one coming! It's so different from the other takes, maybe a little chilling, but well written.

Thanks..........cj

Fiauna said...

I LOVED it! You are such an inspiration to me! Can I be you when I grow up?

Caroline said...

Sue, please tell me when you are planning on writing a novel (if you have't already that I don't know about) because if it's ANYTHING like the little tidbits we get to read here it will be awesome.

How you come up with this amazes me. And that's the genius of a talented writer.

VK said...

I am SO not as imaginative as you are. I love the way you think.

Malisa said...

Awwww! That was sweet and heartbreaking! Haven't we all been there? By the way, looks like he deserved that lipstick on his car! :)

I just posted my contribution for the week. Hope you will join me on my blog!

Malisa

Tina said...

awww what a sad story. its funny the things we can remember when we are younger.

the ghosts and replays bit was too cool! :)

Im a little late posting from last week. Hope you can still stop by. Thanks :)

http://www.mummy-diaries.com/2010/07/saturday-centus-chasing-rainbows.html

Jenny said...

Poignant and thought provoking. I can feel her pain so clearly Sue.

You really wrote the heck out of this prompt girl!

Terra said...

another girl who turns to music as I do...to feel. This was great.