Saturday, September 6, 2014

On Parenting: Walking the line

On Parenting: Walking the Line
©2014 Susan Noyes Anderson

Of late, my life is hard at best,
and best is hard to find.
I lay down, but I get no rest
with so much on my mind.

My body's always out of sorts;
my brain is stuck in worry.
I do the things I have to do
but flatly, in a hurry.

I'm eating more than I should eat
and exercising less.
Anxiety and consternation 
crowd my happiness.

The things I fret and fret about
are not in my control.
I know if I would let them go,
then I would feel more whole.

I need to give them to the Lord,
just trust Him and be still;
but it is hard to watch and wait
until I know His will.

That's parenthood: To care so much
yet have so little "juice."
Adult children need struggles. 
Face the facts, and cut them loose.

But don't forget to walk that fine line.
Keep the rope on hand.
Supporting is a parent's role
(at times). You understand?

It's no small feat to be a mom
who gets the balance right,
who listens lovingly by day
and still sleeps well at night...

The one who keeps a boundary, but
knows when to cross it, too.
God's training me again, right now.
(I still have work to do!)


It does help quite a bit to see
the Lord knows what He's doing.
I feel Him with me every hour:
supporting, not rescuing.

{Apparently, He's got this parenting 
of adults thing down pat.}


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Friko said...

Mothering, not smothering, they tell us we must do when they’re small.

When they’re grown we must let them go, let them have their head, find their own way, but oh yes, we must be ready at all times to catch them when they fall, extend a hand full of giving when they need us and never, ever, ask anything in return.

Parenting is not easy.

carol l mckenna said...

Great post for P ~ let it be, let go! hard for all of us ~ Happy Weekend to you!

artmusedog and carol (A Creative Harbor)

Gattina said...

Beautiful poem !

Pondside said...

As happens so often, Sue, we seem to be on the same wavelength. That fine line is so important, and it has to be a flexible line - but you put that perfectly.

EG CameraGirl said...

It's true that parenting continues to be stressful even after the kids have grown up.

Jim said...

Parenting doesn't stop when they leave. Our daughter texted this morning that they, she and the five-year old GD, were going to miss their French lessons. Billy had gone to the golf course with the car seat.

To late to be of help, about an hour and a half away, we FaceTimed the GD. Not only upset for missing her lesson, but she had fallen down the stair. By the time we hung up everyone was happier except for Billy. He didn't even know the trouble he was in until he came in from golf.
I could tell you more, but nothing is short. Like for two years we called our daughter in college every morning to wake her up. She had been sleeping through the alarm.

Gail said...

Brilliant!!! Beautiful and so true.

I have a bad habit of giving things to God and THEN I take them back. I so like to be in charge but know He does it better.

Mom said once you never stop being a parent. So here's a toast (sweet tea) to all the parents out there...may we get it right.

Brian Miller said...

ha. that is parenthood...realizing you can not do it alone...and that it is too big a burden for any one of us...or pair of us...we can not be there for everything...god can though....smiles.

yaya said...

Having had adult kiddos come home to live for a bit I understand the balance that's needed. It's difficult to have them back and not step into the "Mom & Dad" role. But they're not kids anymore and they don't really want our advice...just our support. It's great when they can figure out how to get back on track...then move out for good!

Terra said...

Wonderful poem about constant changes needed in parenting. Our children are adults now so we do step back, for their sake. Always available for hugs and spending time together.

Brona Joy said...

We're half way through the teen years...this sounds like we can't count on it being easier once their adults!

Take heart - our parents survived our teens and young adult years to tell the tale(s)...we will get through this time too :-)

Judie said...

It's so hard when we see our adult children suffering with issues. Your lovely piece really speaks to me,Sue!

Amy said...

You mean to tell me it never gets easier?! Sigh.
Great post. At least I know what I have to look forward to. 😜

Viki said...

Ain't this the truth. I wish it was easier. Sometimes I long for the past, little kids little problems.

The Quintessential Magpie said...

Wow! This is amazing! Your cadence is perfect. And the rhyme clever!


Sheila :-)

LeAnn said...

This is one poem that I can so relate too. I just love it. You continue to amaze me with your talents.
Blessings for writing this one!

karen said...

Oh boy oh boy... do I ever feel your pain! But you know that. All we can do is our best, and then we must just have faith that all will work out as it should. And, as it turns out, it usually does. Sleep well, my friend.

Grandma Honey said...

No one prepared me for the fact that the hardest part of parenting is adult children. To hurt for them and not be able to control much, or do enough to help is so painful.

Christa atCedarmereFarm said...

We can never stop being parents. You are right about how difficult it is to walk the fine line of parenthood. BTW, I LOVE the picture of the worried mom. Precious! Love your poem too. It's very cute.

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