A photo of me from my Journal
©2014 Susan Noyes Anderson
One faded girl in sepia,
eyes bright and opened wide.
Her life was sweet and simple then,
with nothing much to hide.
No worry bubbled through her veins;
no sadness scarred her soul.
The world was hers or nearly so;
she traveled without toll.
The sun shone warm upon her face;
each storm but cleared the air.
When lightning danced, the thunder clapped;
foul weather bowed to fair.
Her photo whispers, draws me in,
reminds me of a day
when innocence was all I knew
and troubles passed away.
The glow of faith had yet to face
the darkness at the door,
and loss had left no lasting stain
upon the unmarked floor.
What would it be to turn back time
and dwell behind her eyes,
when answers came in black and white
and truth steered clear of lies?
I still remember joy unbound
by grownup woes and cares,
untempered by the ups and downs
a wife and mother shares.
Those narrow shoulders left no room
for burdens on my back,
and every hope was still alive
and every dream on track.
Sometimes I long to be that girl.
Just once more, I would be
the little girl who thought she could
control her destiny.
And for a day I'd sail away
as far as I could go,
back to the years when clouds and rain
bespoke a bright rainbow.
Yet seasons change, all in their time.
Each foe and every fight
made of that girl a woman
who has learned to seek the Light.
Not only for herself but for
the ones that she holds dear.
Sweet memories in sepia
yield now to pictures clear.
Today, her golden hair is white,
and years have lined her face
with hard-earned knowledge, wisdom, and
no small amount of grace.
When courage wanes, sometimes I mourn
the girl I used to be.
And yet, to lose what I am now
would set me back, not free.
So I will keep my lessons earned,
embrace the roles I fill,
and treasure up the little girl
that lives inside me still.
Life calls for guts and glory and
a forward-looking view.
The burdens bring forth blessings.
God sees His children through.
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