Saturday, March 5, 2011

Sweet Sins


Could there be a better way to start the weekend than this? Saturday Centus is nothin' but fun, and adding my hundred words to Jenny's prompt is my idea of a good time. (You can recognize said prompt by its lovely red hue.)

∞§∞

Sweet Sins

The energy of this place was electric, a slow, sneaky jolt that pulsed through his nervous system like warm honey, sweet and just a little bit sticky. The sensations stuck, too: warm lights in a darkened room; the smell of good tobacco; the snap of clean, crisp decks mid-shuffle. The very air welcomed him.

Blackjack was his game, always had been. He liked the one-on-one of it, even in a crowd; he played against the deck, not the dealer. Red and black on bright-white, like a ledger. Money colors.

Everything depended upon this single card.

It was a lie. But he was a believer.

∞§∞

30 comments:

  1. Really well written, you created the scene brilliantly, well done!

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  2. An excellent take on the prompt...tactile and vivid picture of how a compulsive gambler thinks and feels !!!

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  3. A serious addict!! I think I can see why this guy is so addicted. I can almost smell it in there. :)

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  4. Great writing! I could actually see the room!

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  5. I love:
    "It was a lie, but he was a believer."
    Reminded me of many temptations of life, and how we can get sucked in.

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  6. Very vivid mental pictures come while reading this...nice job.

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  7. love the atmosphere you create...like honey, great play there...ha, always waiting on the right cards...

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  8. gave me goose bumps. I could really picture it in my mind.

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  9. You are amazing Sue! I loved it.

    P.S. How did Dave like your surprise early return?

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  10. I could almost see the scene through the smoky air. Great job!

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  11. I've seen that guy a million times when I lived in Vegas- you painted it just right.

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  12. Sue how amazing you are honey to be able to write something so clear as this. Had me sitting there with him. lol
    Hope you had a wonderful Saturday I know we all enjoyed your Saturday post
    Love ya
    Maggie

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  13. Very smooth Sue! That's how it felt to read it..like gliding through the room with the gambler and feeling the thrill..I admire your talent!

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  14. you always paint such a vivid picture ... really well done Sue!

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  15. Amazing imagery in this! Great job!

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  16. Great scene setting! The addicted gambler is always self-deceiving.

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  17. Excellent! I could picture this in my mind. And you built the sense of anticipation beautifully. Really well done! Kat

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  18. Hate blackjack; love this story.

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  19. last line is my favorite..."but he is a believer". Isn't it always the case? Why do we believe the lies of our vices? Excellent centus sweet Sue!

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  20. I have never been at a black jack table so the image I saw in mind was pretty somewhat like a Clark Gable movie scene. Very good Sue!~Ames

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  21. Description of setting and character all in one. Very impressively done!

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  22. You have such a wonderful way with words. I re-read the first sentence three times because of it. Great title, too.
    xoRobyn

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  23. I feel the warmth and sultry feeling in the room, I can smell the smoke, and have on a beautiful gown. I sure hope he wins that money,...hmmm, what's the lie??

    (always leave me wanting more,...-brilliant, as usual!!)

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  24. Great set up, I was at the table with this guy, feeling nervous excitement! Very well written.

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  25. Since they made gambling legal in California, there have many many addicts created. So sad.

    This was a great take on the Sentus.

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  26. amazing . . . you just always amaze me!

    Kristin

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  27. Oh this has great style and vision in such few words too...a great show me the single card take!

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  28. This post follows your "I'm sneaking home a day early post" and the title just made me laugh so hard that I need to go put an ice pack on my face. You're a joy!

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  29. oh i can feel the intensity in the air myself just reading it!

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  30. Sue, This is so vividly visual. Once again, you have put together a very real CS with an underlying moral.

    Namaste..........cj

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