Stephanie Nielson: A Woman of God

If I wrote about anything but Stephanie Nielson and her appearance on Oprah yesterday, I wouldn't be true to myself. Her segment moved me to the extent that I was emotional (yep, cried like a baby) most of the way through it, not because I felt sorry for her but because I admired and was inspired by her.

It was more than that, really. I had a spiritual experience watching her. What I mean to say is, I could see her spirit shining through not just her eyes, but her entire face. This brightness didn't make Stephanie's scars disappear altogether, yet to a great degree that was the effect, because her spiritual countenance somehow eclipsed the physical. She was simply radiant; and when I looked at her, what glowed back at me was Stephanie in all her pre-accident glory, magnified by her experiences and superimposed on the physical planes of her wounded face in some kind of translucent way that no special effects genius could ever replicate. It was like I was seeing her in two dimensions, and the ethereal one overshadowed the other.

I'm not explaining it well enough, but those of you who saw her must know what I mean. It is not a polite exaggeration to say that she looked absolutely beautiful, for she did. I wrote on her Facebook page that she reminded me of that city on a hill that cannot be hid. And because of the amazing example she was, is, and has been to women all over the world, she brought to my mind these words from Sheri Dew:

"I will never forget my first experience on the Mount of Beatitudes overlooking the Sea of Galilee. As I sat on that storied place, I saw in the distance a city built on a hill. The visual image of a city that could not be hid was stunning, and as I pondered the symbolism I had an overwhelming impression that we, as women of God, are like that city. If we will leave behind the things of the world and come unto Christ so that the Spirit radiates through our lives and from our eyes, if we will cherish our covenants and 'hold out faithful to the end,' our collective and individual uniqueness will be as a light unto the world...a wellspring of hope, peace, virtue, and joy."

"The Relief Society Declaration proclaims that 'we are women of faith, virtue, vision, and charity' who rejoice in motherhood, womanhood, and the sanctity of the family. We cannot be women of the world, for we are latter-day women of God. (Sheri Dew)

And that's what Stephanie Nielson clearly is, a woman of God. She did us all proud yesterday. She did herself proud, too, and she did the Lord proud. Her kindness (in bringing a young woman discouraged by motherhood into her home and showing her, in the gentlest way imaginable, the sacred nature of caring for those you love) was deeply touching. I am certain that Stephanie changed that mother's life for the better. Not only was she able to see mothering from a whole new perspective, but she felt the spirit in the Nielson home. In fact, it was obvious that she had commented at length about what she and Oprah called the "energy" of the home, because Oprah asked her to explain it. Her description spoke of an immediate feeling of warmth, peace, calm, relaxed ease, and acceptance.

After discussing the feeling in the Nielson home, Oprah went on to ask the young mother (Andrea) what she had observed about Christian and his relationship to and with Stephanie. Her answer described a celestial marriage in every sense of the word...for all the world to hear. And the world got a good look at celestial marriage as well, in the eyes and faces of both Stephanie and Christian as they related to each other. It was a gift. One the audience felt and received.

Stephanie flat-lined twice in the hospital, and she shared with the viewers a near-death experience where she was given the choice to come back to "have a hard life" and raise her family or remain in the spirit world to wait for them. She said the choice was "easy." "I chose the hard way, because of the family," she explained. "Definitely." Stephanie would be there for her husband and children, no matter how difficult.

I saw a woman of God in the most unlikely place yesterday, on the Oprah show. And she made me want to be better, for "few people can resist a woman who lives and conducts her life under the influence of the Holy Ghost. No woman is a more vibrant instrument in the hands of the Lord than a woman of God who is thrilled to be who she is!" (Sheri Dew)

Life is harder now, with challenges at once immense and unrelenting, but Stephanie Nielson remains thrilled to be who she is. Her reason? Because, as she told the young mother who visited her (gesturing toward the family picture taken before her accident), "I still have all of these people in my life, and all of this is still love."

Which is what eternal families are all about. Still living. Still loving. Forever.